Forks High School Blogs
by Crazy about Harry Potter
Summary: Forks has got a Blog. Read thoughts from our favourite Cullens, Bella and more. Watch Edward go head over heals for Bella on his Blog.
1. Chapter 1

Authors Note: I know fan fiction already has some Blogs up on Twilight already but I thought I'd make one of my own just to get away from all the Harry Potter fan fictions I've made

Authors Note: I know fan fiction already has some Blogs up on Twilight already but I thought I'd make one of my own just to get away from all the Harry Potter fan fictions I've made.

Chapter 1 – New school, new friends, new boys

**New Girl At Forks**

Hi out there to everyone at Forks High School. My name is Isabella Swan (But you can call me Bella) and I'm new here. Well actually I'm living with my father Charlie Swan because I've have had enough of Renee and Phil. I don't really like Phil that much anyway.

Anyway as I said I'm new here.

I hope I can make some new friends.

Posted By: Bella Swan

--

Comments:

Hey Bella. I'm your friend right?

Jessica Stanley (**A/N I think that was her last name. Couldn't be bothered to look it up)**

--

Yeah you're my friend Jess. So are Angela, Ben and Mike

Bella Swan

--

Sweet. Love ya Bella

Mike Newton

The Story Of A Edward Cullen

I must die! No wait I can't die because of what I am. Someone burn me please. No don't

The new girl is so beautiful. I tried to see her thoughts but I can't. WHO PUT HER THOUGHTS ON MUTE??

I have put this blog on block from everyone at school except for my family because we have a secret and it must be kept within us all.

Anyway her name is Isabella Swan but she likes to be called Bella. Her hair is amazing…and her eyes…don't even get me started on that.

Her scent is…I don't know how to describe her scent. It's beautiful. That's all I can say about it.

Oh god I think I'm going crazy.

Posted By: Edward Cullen

--

Comments:

Oooh Edward and Bella sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G.

Emmett Cullen

--

Shut up Emmett or I'll pull your nose off

Edward Cullen

--

How so? I'm stronger than you remember

Emmett Cullen

--

Doh! I'll just chop it off instead you mongrel!

Edward Cullen

--

What is this I hear you are going to do Edward?

Rosalie Cullen (Hale)

Authors Note: I hoped you like it for my first story of Twilight. Please review or The Vouturi are coming to get you.


	2. Chapter 2

Future Girl

Future Girl

I would love to tell Edward what is going to happen between Bella and himself but I just can't bring myself to say it because he might freak out.

Oh and I see myself and Rosalie going shopping. What do you say?

Even if I already know what the answer is going to be.

Comments

--

Sure. Can't have enough clothes

Rosalie Cullen/Hale

--

You already have too many shoes

Jasper Cullen

--

Gasp! I want a DIVORCE!!

Alice Cullen

--

No one is getting a divorce. Jasper don't complain about Alice's shoes…even if she has 103.

Charlise Cullen

--

Do not. I've got 203

Alice Cullen

--

ALICE CULLEN YOU'RE IN BIG TROUBLE!!

Charlise Cullen

Sexy Doc

Why does Alice ALWAYS buy shoes? Oh right…I forgot…SHE'S A GIRL!!

And next time Jasper comes into my room I am going to be ready for him with a pair of scissors so I can chop his untidy, messy, haystack hair.

And a message to Emmett: PLEASE grow a little bit more hair. You do not look sexy. Rosalie do you agree?

Ban the girls from shopping

Charlise Cullen

Comments

--

My hair is fine. It doesn't need to be chopped off.

Jasper Cullen

--

I'll burn you alive if you ban us from shopping

Alice Cullen

--

Port Angelus mall has been permently shut down. Heard Jessica Stanley talking about it at school today to Bella.

Emmett Cullen

--

NOOOOOO that CAN'T be true!!

Rosalie Cullen

--

That's because it's not

Alice Cullen

--

…EMMETT CULLEN I'M COMING TO KICK YOUR ASS!

Rosalie Cullen/Hale

--

Oooh so scared

Emmett Cullen

Authors Note: I have written more chapters but I am bust to post them. PLEASE review.


	3. Chapter 3

Authors Note: Thanks for the reviews guys

Authors Note: Thanks for the reviews guys. It would make this writer a lot happier if you could give her some suggestions on what I should put I the story.

P.S. It's my birthday on Thursday: 23rd October.

Chapter 3 – Butt kicking

**Thoughts of a Practical Joker**

Ouch! She actually did it. As soon as I came out from our bedroom she kicked my bum. Must have PMS…wait Vampires don't have periods do they? Humans do…HA, HA, HA

But I can tell you right now Rosalie…I will beat you at a game of arm wrestle.

And this time…I WILL BEAT YOU!! Because I am stronger than you. Mua, ha, ha, ha

Emmett Cullen

Comments

……………**.**

Bring it on buddy!

Rosalie Cullen/ Hale

Beautiful Girl

I WON!! Na, na, na, na, na, na. In your face!!

Rosalie

……………**..**

Comments

……………**..**

You only won because you superglued your enbow to the table. But then the table broke and you we're trapped and everyone laughed. Now if you'll excuse me. HA, HA, HA, HA, HA

Jasper Cullen

……………**..**

Shut up. I still won though.

**Loving Wife/Mother for eternity**

To all the shop-a-holics out there in this family. Anyone want to join me in Port Angelas for a while?

Alice can't buy shoes though. If she does then she is grounded for 14 years. Joke about the 14 years but she will be grounded. Don't try to agrue your way out of it either.

I'M JOKING!!

Esme Cullen

……………

Comments

Mummmm I'm all shopped out!

Alice Cullen

…………**..**

Me too!

Rosalie Cullen/ Hale

…………**..**

Aww all the shoes are going to be so disappointed.

Jasper Hale


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 – Must kill…

Chapter 4 – Must kill…

**Beautiful Girl**

He must die. He is very lucky that I haven't bitten his bald head of yet…well he isn't THAT bald…but he is old enough to be bald.

Mike Newton is also bugging me…can I please kick him in the place that hurts? I can! Thanks. Newton scumbag here I come…erm Edward can you please run me to his house because I am not a very fast runner.

Anyway…

Can I please have a cat? I've always wanted a cat. Can I, can I, can I?

Note to self: Buy a new hairstraightener. And yes I know that I can't spell hairstraitner...but who am I to blame? I'M BLONDE FOR CYRING OUT LOUD!

--

Comments

--

Go hunting and you can have a pretty little mountain Lion.

Esme Cullen

--

B-b-but it's not the same

Rosalie Cullen

--

Then no. The big cat for dinner or nothing at all

Esme Cullen

--

Jazz is sweet!

What a day! What really bugs me is that I can't read minds. Thankfully Edward can. But that's the problem you have a mind reading brother…that can read _your _mind all day long. I must have been thinking of Alice in the nude because he kept giving me strange looks. Then Alice probably saw what I was thinking because she kept shuddering…oh wait that was probably Emmett picking his nose.

--

Comments: None

Authors Note: Sorry that this chapter is short but the next one will be longer. I have to get some ideas first.


	5. Chapter 5

The story of Edward Cullen

**Authors Note: Oh HA, HA, HA I was wondering why I wasn't getting any reviews. Stupid fanfiction has been putting new things up or something. So I have been writing new chapters for stories while I am listening to Ronan Keating. LOVE HIM! If you haven't heard his music I suggest you do because you'll love him. And Boyzone. (insert hearts here)**

**The story of Edward Cullen**

Arrrgghhh. During lunch today Jessica Stanley was talking to me inside her head. Well not exactly to me. More like not keeping her thoughts under control. This is what she said: _Of course she's already crushing on the Cullen's. Fat lot of good it'll do her. She's not even pretty. I don't know why Eric is staring at her…or Mike. Everyone's looking at me today, too. Isn't it lucky Bella's had 2 classes with me…I bet Mike will want to ask me what she's…_

I tried to block it out at that point but I couldn't. So I went to the bathroom for no reason.

But when I came back I could hear everyone else talking about HER in their heads. I now wish I didn't have the ability to read minds.

Posted by: Edward Cullen

Comments:

Aww cheer up Edward. You think you have it bad. I'm the one who can read the future. Oh and read my blog.

Alice Cullen

**Future Girl**

Oooh I have some exciting news to tell everyone. Well just my family anyway. I'm blocking this message from Edward even though I said there was something on my blog to read.

EDWARD AND BELLA SWAN ARE GOING TO BE GOING OUT!!!!! I just decided to look into her future and I saw she and Edward would be going out soon!

But please don't tell Edward

Posted By: Alice Cullen

Comments:

WOAH! ARE YOU FRIKKEN SERIOUS?

Emmett Cullen

Yes I am serious.

Alice Cullen

Holy Mountain Lion!

Emmett Cullen

Yeah. Something along those LIONS.

Jasper Cullen

Please review.

Here goes the chant to MAKE you review. Ready? Ok

CLEARS THROAT

REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: The characters are not mine but the story is

Disclaimer: The characters are not mine but the story is.

Authors Note: Please review after you've read. Tell me what you're feeling inside. E.g.: That was hilarious please do more or THAT WAS CRAP!!

Just review, review, review, read.

Oh and by the way I've got 1597 hits. Why not that many reviews. REVIEW THE DAMN STORY!!!!!!!!

Chapter 6

Jazz is sweet

Arrrgghhh! Why did I think about that! Why did I have to do that? Why can't schools have Vampires as students and not humans! I almost ate someone today. Nice scent though. That damn heater! That damn girl!

WE WANT VAMPIRES NOT SILLY STUDENTS!

Posted By: Jasper Cullen

Comments:

Jasper it's not anyone's fault. And by my mind you weren't going to do anything.

Alice Cullen

The Story of Edward Cullen

Tanya followed me when I went away. I told her I wasn't the one for her. She gets so annoying sometimes. Ugh!

But by Alice's mind I think she saw that I'm going to fall in love with the new girl Bella Swan.

But Alice. One question: I'm too dangerous for her aren't I?

Posted By: Edward Cullen

Comments:

Uh…I'm not sure.

WHO WANTS TO GO AHOPPING?

Alice Cullen

Ahopping? Don't you mean shopping?

Rosalie Cullen.

Yes that's what I meant. *cough* WHO WANTS TO GO SHOPPING???

Alice Cullen

ME, ME, ME, ME, ME! YAY SHOPPING.

Oooh heard the song have without you?

Rosalie Cullen

Authors Note: Please review, review, review, review, review, review, review.

If you don't I'm sending myself over to you! And it ain't gonna be pretty! And I'll try to make the chapters bigger next time.


	7. Chapter 7

Authors Note: Please review. Hogwarts MSN is feeling lonely because it hasn't had any reviews for AGES! And I updated the same time I updated FHSB.

Chapter 7

_Popular_Blonde_Jess_

Yes hello Forks it's your best friend Jessica Stanley. A you all know I am the most beautifulest girl at Forks high. And…I would just like to say I think the new girl is a bit up herself. But I think…that we can be good friends. But I have soooo many friends now that I don't need anymore.

And I really hoped that the Pailin chick would get in as president. But no the black person had to get it. Can't remember his name.

OH and have I mentioned how HOT Mike is? I haven't? Oh well. HE IS SO HOT!

------------------

Comments

You are the one up yourself Stanley!

Not telling name

------------------

Mike_da_bomb

You know what I'd really like to do? I'd like to ask the new girl out. But I know that Jess likes me and I don't feel the same way about her. WHO WOULD? Well my mind might change in couple of years. That is if she stops all her gossiping. I know that Ben likes Angela. But I liked Angela once too.

(SCREAMS)

-------------------

Comments:

None

Mrs_A

(A/N: I don't remember any of the teachers so I am adding my own in. I've bought Twilight today with my birthday money.)

I am really sick of some of the students here. Jessica Stanley NEVER shuts up. If I were a student I would kindly tell her to shut her mouth up or I'll shut it for her.

Ooo I like this song. Fly on the wall by Miley Cyrus.

I know I like Miley Cyrus.

-------------------

Comments

When is our English assignment due Miss?

Tyler

------------------

Why do you like Miley Cyrus?

Ben

New Girl at Forks

Wow. I have had a great day at school. That's all I can say.

Also I wish I was 18 so I can vote for the President of of US. I of course would vote for Obama. Well he won so yeah…my wish came true. I just wish my other wish would come true.

Comments:

What wish?

Jessica Stanley


	8. Chapter 8

Authors Note: Now I am going to fail my exams for sure now if I don't start studying. But who cares I have a good brain I'll remember everything.

Thank you to all my lovely reviews from everyone who sent me one. I love you all. (Blows kisses)

And from my Drama class to the Forks Drama class. This is a lesson we had this week on Friday afternoon. It was so much fun I tell you so I'm writing it up.

You asked for a bigger chapter you'll get a bigger chapter.

Chapter 8

**New Girl At Forks**

**Mood: Happy**

**Food: None**

**Music: Picture of you - Boyzone**

What a fun class that was. Drama is so much fun here compared to my old school. Do you want to know what happened? Okay I'll tell you to the people who don't take Drama and now will probably wish they do.

Well the teacher came into the room and told us to sit facing the stage. And these year 12 people came in. There were only 4. They much have been helping classes around the school or whatever.

Anyway the teacher chose 2 people to go on the stage. Jess and Ben. The theme was that they were at a bus stop and the person who was not sitting on the seat had to try and make the person move off the bus stop without touching them.

Jess was the one on the bench and Ben walked up sat down beside her and said "I'm seeing my boyfriend later"

And Jess said "Oh really. Whose your boyfriend?"

Ben pointed to Mike Newton in the crowd. Everyone laughed. And Jess got up and walked away.

They rotated. Ben was the person sitting on the seat and the person trying to get him off was Tom (**AN/ Who cares it's a Drama class I can make up some names.)**

Tom sat down. He looked in his pants then looked at Ben's (**AN/ you all know what I'm talking about right? Yeah, yeah I know it's disgusting but this is what happened in class. Well he was looking at the pants not inside the pants. Tom was pretending to look inside his own. You'll get it)**

And this went on for ages. Mitch bent over to get something off the ground and poked his bum at Ebony's face

Then when the bell was about to ring the last 2 people Tyler and myself were there.

I walked over and sat down. Tyler got up and said "bout time the bus got here"

All in all it was a really funny lesson. I couldn't have had a better day.

Miss you are the best Drama teacher EVER!!!!

----------------------

Comments

---------------------

Why thank you Bella. I really appreciate it. But it wasn't me who was doing all the work it was you lot. And it certainly kept the class quiet. And not bad for a newcomer

Miss Thom

--------------------

I have to agree with Bella. It WAS a fun lesson. I would have loved to do it again.

Jessica Stanley

--------------------

On Monday Jessica

Miss Thom

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The Story of Edward Cullen

At least someone had a good day. I have been stressing out about these damn exams coming up next week and I haven't even studied. Well I suppose I don't really need to seeing as I have done the subject and test at least 30 times already.

Can we move to Australia. Nevermind it's too sunny there we'll all die.

Anyway I must go. I am feeling very hungry because I have no eaten in a week. Emmett want to join me for a Lion?

-------------------

Sure man. And I get first dibs on the Lion. If you're able to catch one

Emmett Cullen

I'm also hungry. I want a Deer because they taste nice

Jasper Cullen

---------------------

Sexy Doctor

I am very pleased everyone has had a good day at school. Alice and Rosalie why aren't you to going to go hunting? Ph I know why because you have gone SHOPPING. Alice how many pairs of shoes do you have now? I think I have counted 306. And how many does Rosalie have? 22. WHY IS THAT ALICE?

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Comments: None

Authors Note: I was a bit longer than the last chapters. Please review. I like reviews they make me want to go on and make my readers very happy. And if you review you get a happy author and the happy author makes the readers happy.

So REVIEW.


	9. Chapter 9

Beautiful Girl

Charlise I don't have 22 pairs of shoes. EMMETT WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY SHOES!

If I ever get my hands on you I will bite your head off and burn it! Then I will bite Edwards piano and turn in into a Vampire and make it chase after your BODY!

That will teach you to mess with me and my shoes.

Posted By: Rosalie Cullen

…………**.**

Comments

………….

Well that's good news then. But why don't you have more shoes than Alice? She's got 203 and Rosalie doesn't even have 100. Let me go check. Hang on.

Okay I'm back. I'm very sorry to say Rose but all your shoes have GONE!

Emmett Cullen

………….

WHAT!!!

Rosalie Cullen

…………

Future Girl

Don't freak Rose but all your shoes are in my room. Edward must have been playing around in their again and decided to hide your shoes.

If I was your wife I would kill you but seeing as you're my brother I'll let you live! NOT! START RUNNING EDWARD MASON CULLEN!!!!!!

Posted By: Alice Cullen

…………..

Comments

………….

I'll get them now.

Rosalie Cullen

…………

Um…now? You mean right now? Um…can't it wait? I mean. Their just shoes. Pfft

Alice Cullen

………….

I hear what's going on Alice

Edward Cullen

Loving Mother/Wife for Eternity

I will have no one having sex in my house thank you. It is very disturbing and Edward is sick of hearing about it. Rosalie go get your shoes please.

IT'S DISGUSTING. Wait til your older…Nevermind

Esme Cullen

………….

Comments:

………….

It's what everyone does Esme. You have to get used to it. And I know your future too. Have a good time tonight Esme. *wink, wink*

Alice Cullen

………….

What are you on?

Esme Cullen

…………

CRACK!

Emmett Cullen

………..

AM. NOT. ON. CRACK!

Alice Cullen

Authors Note: I would like to thank you for reviewing. Please keep doing so. Thanks.


	10. Chapter 10

Authors Note: I'll take your thoughts into account if you tell me what you want done with this story.

Chapter 10

**Jazz is sweet**

Dear Blog. Today I made Carlisle feel he was in love with Edward…again. LOL. It was so funny. I slipped this little potion I made up last week and it was only meant to work for an hour but it's been an hour…well 5 and it still haven't worn off.

I think when it finally wears off Edward and Carlisle will be after my blood. All I can hear is Edward trying to get away from him.

But to be honest it's hilarious

Jasper Cullen

………….

Comments

………….

You've said it baby

Alice Cullen

**The Story of Edward Cullen**

My feelings? Why does everyone want to know about my feelings? What do you think my feelings are? Okay I will tell you my feelings.

I LOVE BELLA SWANN! Okay that's what my feelings are like. I love her. And I can't seem to get her out of my head.

And you know who else I can't get out of my head. Carlisle. He is thinking very dirty thoughts of me. And it very disturbing.

Alice stop laughing it's not funny.

And I can hear him coming up the stairs right now singing…what's that he's singing? Oh hell no not WIGGLE IT BY RICKI - LEE

The floor is calling but I, can't do it on my own  
I need someone who is willing, to get down with me all night  
Boy are you that somebody? I wanna rock this party  
We'll keep it moving all night long

I need you to work with me a little bit, work it just a little bit  
Twork it just a little cos I just wanna wiggle it  
Just let me turn around, baby I wanna be your lady  
And you make me go crazy the way you shake it for me

**CHORUS**  
Baby I need you to shake that a little for me  
Come closer boy cos I want you to put it on me  
Why don't you show me just what you can do for me?  
Baby I need you to wi-wiggle it wiggle it  
Wiggle it just a little bit  
Now let me see you wiggle it just a little bit

Oh I'm looking for somebody who can go all night with me  
So baby do your thing and show me what you got for me  
Cos I dont' even really wanna waste my time on someone full of shhhh  
So baby, why don't you show me

I need you to work with me a little bit, work it just a little bit  
Twork it just a little cos I just wanna wiggle it  
Just let me turn around, baby I wanna be your lady  
And you make me go crazy the way you shake it for me

**CHORUS**  
Baby I need you to shake that a little for me  
Come closer boy cos I want you to put it on me  
Why don't you show me just what you can do for me?  
Baby I need you to wi-wiggle it wiggle it  
Wiggle it just a little bit  
Now let me see you wiggle it just a little bit

rapping

**CHORUS**  
Baby I need you to shake that a little for me  
Come closer boy cos I want you to put it on me  
Why don't you show me just what you can do for me?  
Baby I need you to wi-wiggle it wiggle it  
Wiggle it just a little bit  
Now let me see you wiggle it just a little bit

**Sexy Doc**

Oh Edward darling:

A hundred days had made me older  
since the last time that I've saw your pretty face

A thousand lights had made me colder and I don't think I can look at this the same

But all the miles had separate  
They disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby  
but your still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
and I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
but your still with me in my dreams  
And tonight it's only you and me

The miles just keep rollin  
as the people either way to say hello  
I've heard this life is overrated  
but I hope that it gets better as we go

I'm here without you baby  
but your still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
and I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
but your still with me in my dreams  
And tonight girl it's only you and me

Everything I know,  
and anywhere I go  
it gets hard but it won't take away my love  
And when the last one falls,  
when it's all said and done  
it get hard but it won't take away my love

I'm here without you baby  
but your still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
and I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
but your still with me in my dreams  
And tonight girl it's only you and me

Comments:

………………..

LEAVE ME ALONE YOU RAPIST

EDWARD CULLEN (LEAVE ME ALONE)

……………….

But I love you…what…I just didn't say that did i?

Carlisle Cullen

………………

Uh-oh

Jasper Cullen


	11. Chapter 11

Authors Note: To**sabrinaluvstwilight **the only reason I'm updating so much today is because I'm doing everything I can to keep myself from getting stressed about my final exams.

But I'm glad you're enjoying my story.

Authors Note 2: In this chapter I am skipping up to where Edward saves Bella from Tyler's van.

Chapter 11

New Girl At Forks

I'd thought I'd update before I go to school. It's another cold, wet, miserable day today. I'd love it if it cleared up before I got to school. But I doubt that's going to happen.

You know where I'd love to go? Australia. It never rains there you know…well only a couple of times a month. But it is the most beautiful part of the world so I'm told.

Anyway I need to go. Catch you later

Posted By: Bella Swan

………….

Comments:

None

………….

AFTER SCHOOL!

The Story of Edward Cullen

Tell me if I'm a fool or not? I saved Bella from Tyler's oncoming Van. If I wasn't there she would have been dead for sure. But now I feel like I shouldn't have done anything.

But she's alright though. We took her to the hospital. Carlisle was there and he mended her up. Tyler kept saying sorry over and over again and now wants to take her to the prom. She said no because she can't even dance!

Oh god. This crush is getting out of hand…I need to talk to her.

Posted By: Edward Cullen.

………….

Comments:

EDWARD! How dare you suggest that you should not have saved her. It was by my mind and be thankful I said no just in time. SAY THANK YOU TO ME!

Alice Cullen

…………

Thank you Alice

Edward Cullen

Authors Note: Please review. And if anyone says this chapter is short make the next one longer I'll scream at you. And don't try to make me mad because it's not pretty. It's because of my year 12 exams. That's why.

And on the 19th of November I'm going to America. Do you know why? YES! Because of Twilight! Me and my whole family are going. School finished on the 14th this week. WHOO! Exams are a little late though. Blame the dumb teachers.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Sexy Doc

I need to punish you Jasper Cullen for slipping that little potion in my drink yesterday. How about this: No blood for 20 years how about that?

No then you'll die. What about this. You are banned from…ugh why can't I think of a suitable punishment?

Someone help me

Posted By: Carlisle Cullen

-………

Comments:

How about you take his Jeep away for a number of years.

Emmett Cullen

……….

No. Not. Very. Nice.

Jasper Cullen

………

Yes! Thank you Emmett! That is the BEST punishment you could have thinked up in many years. Jasper. No Jeep for 10 years.

Jazz is Sweet

Carlisle took my Jeep. I feel Verrryy depressed at the moment. If anyone bugs me in the next hour I'll get a match and I'll pour oil over you and I'll burn you to death. If you're a human then I'll just get a knife and stab you! Not very nice I know but I feel suicidal myself now that Carlisle took my ONLY love!

Posted By: Jasper Cullen

…………

Comments:

You're ONLY LOVE!

Alice Cullen

………..

No, no that's not what I meant. I meant my only love in cars not Vampires. I love you more than my car

Jasper Cullen

…………

Aww. I love you too Jazzy

Alice Cullen

Future Girl

OMGWTF!!!!! SCARY!!!! FREAKY!!! SCREAM!!!! ARRGGHH!!!

Posted by: Alice Cullen

Comments:

What's with you?

Esme Cullen

……………

Yeah what are you OMGWTFing for?

Emmett Cullen

……….

Trust me…I'll tell you later

Alice Cullen

Authors Note: Don't bug me on how short it is. Just nice reviews please. None of this crappy s#$t


	13. Chapter 13

Authors Note: Have I ever told anyone how much I love Drama? I want to get a role on Home and away. I like drama and I'm good at it. Today we see the drama class do a song somethinerather. I FORGET WHAT IT'S CALLED. I know it starts with S thought.

Chapter 12

New Girl At Forks

I love drama class. It must be the best class EVER! Miss Thom is such a great teacher. And she's really nice.

Anyway today we had to do a freeze frame of a song. Everyone had to do it to the song Mad World by Gary Jules.

We got into groups of 4 or 5. I was with Jess, Mike, and Ashlee. We go a chorus from the song:

And I find it kind of funny

I find it kind of sad

The dreams in which I'm dyin'

Are the best I've ever had

I find it hard to tell you

Coz I find it hard to take

When people run in circles

It's a very, very

mad world, mad world

So we had to do a freeze frame for every 2 lines.

Jess and I did the "and I find it kind of funny" we laughed at each other

And Mike and Ashlee did the sad part so they were crying

Dreams in which I'm dying – Mike and Ashlee were asleep on the stage

And me and Jess were awake and yawning

I find it hard to tell you – Jess was telling me something and I was finding it hard to take

Mike and Ashlee were doing the same

When people run in circles – We all ran in a circle

Anyway. It was really fun. I suppose someone in this school will tell you what they did because I'm not.

Posted by: Bella Cullen

…………

Comments:

I'll tell them what happened IF you say yes to me to take you to the prom

Tyler

…………

I'm not going to be here remember

Bella Swan

Beautiful Girl

At least Edward has got his mind off that Bella Swan chick. But I think Alice and him and talking to each other vire their heads and visions and that. Are you 2 doing that?

Emmett stop wrecking people's houses. What have the humans with more money than us ever done? You don't need to wreck their houses.

As for me. I need to fix my hair. It's all messy and THAT is not a good look.

Posted By: Rosalie Cullen

…………

Comments:

They are not humans they are vampires!

Alice Cullen

………..

Oh…so I guess that's why you were OMGWTFing yesterday?

Edward Cullen

………..

Yep

Alice Cullen

Authors Note: R.E.V.I.E.W!!!!


	14. Chapter 14

XxBella SwanXx

I have changed my name from New Girl At Forks to xXBella SwanxX. I'm not that new to Forks now am I? I guess not.

Edward your eyes have changed colors again. And I would like to tank you right now for suggesting to take me to Port Angeles on Saturday. I really appreciate it. Thanks.

And as for you Mike Newton and Tyler I would like to say for the thousandth time this week that I am NOT going to the dance on Friday. I'm not going to be here. And if I say it one more time I will kill you.

Posted By: Bella Swan

…………

Comments

Sorry. But why did you mention me if I'm going with Jessica?

Mike Newton

………..

Sorry. Oh and Eric I don't really like you so can you PLEASE stop annoying me. I'm not going with you either

Bella Swan

……….

So you ARE going then?

Eric

……….

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bella Swan

Thoughts of a Practical Joker

Just reading Bella Swan's comments on Mike and Eric make me want to laugh. Wait…ha, ha, ha. No that's not very convincing is it? How about this. HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!!!

How was that? Was that convincing enough for you? Yes. Well thank you very much.

*cough I burnt Edwards Volvo cough*

Sorry had a coughing seizure then.

Posted By: Emmett Cullen

………….

Comments:

You didn't do that did you babe?

Rosalie Cullen

…………

Yes I did. And I'm fleeing the country so I'll see you later okay.

Emmett Cullen

The Story of Edward Cullen

AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted By: Edward Cullen

…………

Comments:

Was their any need for you to post that comment?

Alice Cullen

…………

HE BURNT MY VOLVO SO YES. THERE WAS

Edward Cullen

Authors Note: I know what you're thinking: Where was that part in the book? There wasn't I just made it up. He'll buy a new shiny Volvo in a matter of minutes…or days in my case. Depends on how long I take to update.

Please review


	15. Chapter 15

Authors Note: Yes I can harm the almighty Volvo **PurpleDreamer. **And I'm updating now. See? And yes she does have a blog. New Girl at forks but I changed it to xXBellaSwanXx. ARRGGHH!!! Just check out my profile and read my stories.

To **Kristin Rey **if you are reading. Who do you think I should do an IM story for? Twilight because I've already got a Harry Potter MSN.

And to everyone I am very sorry for spelling Carlisle wrong. I will try to spell it right next time.

Chapter 15

Story of Edward Cullen

I am sitting in my room with a box of tissues wiping away my tears because EMMETT BURNT MY VOLVO!!!!!!!!!! If he ever comes back here I'll burn HIS car. I HOPE YOUR READING THIS! YOU HEAR ME? IF YOU EVER COME BACK I'LL KILL YA. Hey isn't that a line off the Lion King where the hyenas tell Simba to run away and never return? IT IS.

Right now where was I? Oh yeah. Emmett I WILL burn your car. If there was anyone else in the plan to burn my car I want to know about it so I can burn YOUR car. Alice why didn't you tell me this was coming?

Posted By: Edward Cullen

…………

Comments

The reason I didn't tell you is because I didn't see it in either of your futures. I was looking into my future for about an hour and didn't realize until I heard you scream.

Alice Cullen

Thoughts of a Practical Joker

Alice if you are reading this DO NOT. I repeat DO NOT tell Edward what I am going to do for him.

If you do tell him I will get Jasper to burn your car for you and see how you like that. No I'll burn something even more valuable than your stinking car.

Posted By: Emmett Cullen

…………

Comments:

You wouldn't dare burn my clothes!

Alice Cullen

…………

Actually I was thinking more along the lines of shoes

Emmett Cullen

..............

*Evil laughter*

Alice Cullen

________________________________________________________________________

Future Girl

MORE EVIL LAUGHTER!

Oh sorry. I am just having a moment. I saw something real good come up in my future just then. And seeing as I know where Emmett is I'm going to track him down.

MUA, HA, HA, HA, HA *COUGH COUGH*

Posted By: Alice Cullen

………….

Comments

Where is he? I want to burn his car.

Edward Cullen

………….

Talk to me I'll listen

Alice Cullen

Authors Note: What do you think Alice's evil plan is?


	16. Chapter 16

Thoughts of a Practical Joker

ARRRRRRRRGGHHHHHHHH!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EDWARD ANTHONY MASON CULLEN! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY CAR???

Posted By: Emmett Cullen

…………

Comments

It was all Alice

Edward Cullen

…………

EDWARD!

Alice Cullen

………….

Well it was your idea

Edward Cullen

…………

EDWARD!!

Alice Cullen

………..

I'm going to come back home and burn your car Alice.

Emmett Cullen

Loving mother/wife for eternity

Okay what is this Emmett shaped hole through 2 walls of our house? The back wall and the front wall. EMMETT you could have opened the door to get through the house. You were practically next to the door when you ran through the wall. And the garage I see has a hole through it. Now it's going to cost thousands of dollars to get it fixed again.

At least you bought Edward a new car. And now you have to buy Alice a new car. If you had burnt Rose's car you would probably be dead by now.

Posted By: Esme Cullen

………..

Comments

I owe everyone an apology. Guys I am sorry for smashing my way thought the walls and burning your cars.

Emmett Cullen

………..

Everyone: Apology accepted

Thoughts of a Practical Joker

All I have to say is yuck! I walked in on Carlisle and Esme doing it…well about to anyway.

I'VE BEEN SCARED FOR LIFE!!!!!

Posted By: Emmett Cullen

………..

Comments: None have been posted

Beautiful Girl

And you watch porn on the internet so I don't see why that disturbed you so much. And it was LIVE.

I need to go shopping to take my mind off this.

Posted By: Rosalie Cullen

…………

Comments:

I'm joining you.

Alice Cullen

Authors Note: I see myself writing another chapter of this. And I see YOU reviewing.


	17. Chapter 17

Authors Note: I'm skipping to where Edward and Bella are going out and are about to meet his family. I'm only doing this because I forget what happened before it.

The Story of Edward Cullen

Hey Bella baby would you like to meet my family today. I'm sure they will like you. The whole family were betting on whether you would come with me. And betting with Alice is just unfair.

Posted By: Edward Cullen

…………

Comments:

Yeah I'll come.

Bella Swan

xXBella SwanXx

Why is there the Statue of Liberty and a whale in my front yard?

Posted by: Bella Swan

…………

Comments: No comments have been posted

Thoughts of a Practical Joker

LOL I put the Statue of Liberty and a whale in Bella Swan's front yard. I was hiding in a tree when her dad came home and saw it.

His words were something like: HOLY BEACHED WHALE!!!

It was absolutely hilarious…until I fell out of the tree and fell 2 meters INTO the ground. Thank god Charlie went inside and didn't see me. If he did see me I would probably be in jail. But HA! I can break out of jail.

Posted By: Emmett Cullen

…………

Comments:

It was YOU. Emmett I love you.

Bella Swan

………..

Excuse me?

Emmett Cullen

………..

Will you marry me?

Emmett Cullen

………..

Sorry that was me just filling in the comments because no one else did. I'm sorry bella for taking your idenity.

Emmett Cullen

…………..

That's okay.

Bella Swan

…………..

That wasn't me that time

Emmett Cullen

Swan Chief

God I think I had a heart attack when I came home this afternoon. Do you know why? Because a whale was in my front yard along with the Statue of Liberty.

Goodness me…I need to lie down

Posted By: Charlie Swan

……….

Comments

Charlie it was Emmett Cullen brother of Edward

Bella Swan


	18. Chapter 18

Jazz is Sweet

I am on here because I have nothing to do and unfortunately I have nothing to say either. I will just go on this blog for no good reason to type up random stuff. Just for fun.

Where have the rest of the family gone I will never know. I think Emmett and Rosalie went for a BIG hunt. Pity she was wearing white.

I know when they come back from their hunting trip she will have blood on the back of her WHITE pants and Emmett will go all: OMG Rosalie you have your PERIOD. It's always been funny.

Bella and Edward have gone to her house to do who knows what.

Carlisle and Esme have gone to a friends place. Alice is probably with Bella and Edward or she is probably gone for a drive somewhere without me.

And I am stuck in the house but out of the rain.

See I told you I could find something to write about.

Posted By: Jasper Cullen

…………

Comments: None have been posted

Future Girl

When I looked into everyone's future today I saw trouble. I really do not like the fact that I see Bella falling down every 10 minutes of the day.

I see Emmett putting his bloody hands on Rosalie's white pants then coming home and yelling out: Oh look everyone Rose has got her period. Then everyone cracks up laughing. Bella hasn't seen it before though. So she's going to laugh real hard. I swear that joke never get's old. It's been going on for AGES! Well I suppose it would if you could never die and your name was Emmett.

Jasper is feeling sad and he doesn't want to be around anyone. I thought he was meant to be a calmer. He certainly isn't cheering himself up today.

Edward is about to kiss Bella for the 6th time since they have started going out. I swear that they are the right people for each other. Bella is such a cutie.

Esme just adores her. She really wants Edward to marry her.

Rosalie just hates her because she's human and she's not. But I can't understand why Rosalie hates her if she was human once herself.

It's just stupid.

Posted By: Alice Cullen

…………

Comments: None have been posted

Loving mother/wife for eternity

I now wish I had gone on that hunting trip with Emmett and Rosalie. I feel pretty hungry. Oh well I suppose I can eat a stray bird if I get too hungry.

I don't know what is wrong with everyone today. Jasper isn't even bothering to cheer himself up. Alice is not even with him for once in her life which is kind of weird.

Carlisle is at work and hasn't even called me yet like he is supposed to.

Rosalie was crying on my shoulder before she went hunting with Emmett this morning.

Edward and Bella are both fine. They are the only two people who are not sad. Oh I see a bear…I'm going to call Emmett and see if he wants to destroy it for me because I don't want to eat it.

Posted By: Esme Cullen

……….

Comments: None have been posted

xXBella SwanXx

If I have read everyone's blogs correctly I would say that everyone is very depressed about something. Or it's the rain that's making us all sad because it was very sunny yesterday and everyone was a happy bunch and now today it's raining and everyone is depressed.

I think I'll join the crowd. Anyone want to join me?

FINE I HATE YOU ALL!

I'm going to start cutting myself because I am an EMO and I HATE my life.

Emmett why did you LEAVE? I HATE YOU

I'm getting dressed in black!

LOL did you like my act?

Posted By: Bella Swan

………..

Comments: None have been posted

Authors Note: This is how I feel today and it would be really nice if you could review to make me happy again. Thanks guys.


	19. Chapter 19

Authors Note: If I haven't already told you I am telling you right now. Twilight was awesome. Yes I brought my laptop with me to type this chapter up.

I'll be back next week on the 27th of November.

Chapter 19

Jazz is cool

I seriously cool people from Forks. Are we the best school in the entire world? YES WE ARE! Do you know why? Because of us…the Cullen's. We're the ones who rock your world everyday of the year…well almost the entire year. Just the school days I mean.

I would like to have MSN but the teachers say no. Do you know why? Because they can't install it. I didn't even think MSN needs installing. Because it doesn't.

Anyway I must be leaving but I'll be back soon to post another blog up on how the rest of the day went.

Posted by: Jasper Cullen

………….

Comments:

Whoa Jasper you are really cheerful today. Too much sugar…I mean blood?

Bella Swan

…………

Don't say that when this blog is not on private

Jasper Cullen

Beautiful Girl

Ugh I hate her. She is a human and I hate her. I want to be a human. Do you know what would make me happy if she…erm…I just wish Edward would change her into a Vampire so I wouldn't have to hate her all the time. I bet we could be good friends if she was a vampire because I have never had a human friend before. Well I have but not a best friend.

Posted By: Rosalie Cullen

…………

Comments:

No comments have been posted

Jazz is sweet

I have had a particular good day. Firstly I went for a hunt in the middle of the night on my own. Trust me you do not want to go on your own when there is a mountain lion behind you and all you can see is it's eyes in the dark. Very freaky.

Anyway I charged at it and ate it. Very tasty. Haven't had one in AGES.

Anyway I went to school and….WOAH Edward has problems controlling his hormones

Posted By: Jasper Cullen

Comments:

Shut up man

Edward Cullen

Authors Note: It's extremely short but I want to go find Emma Watson.


	20. Chapter 20

Jazz_Is_Sweet

Edward if you don't change her I'll have to do it myself even if I don't really want to di it. Or I'll get Emmett to do it.

Please explain why I am typing this on my blog instead of telling Edward myself? Edward hello? Can you hear what I am thinking?

No wait you are hunting with ESME! Grr!

Posted by: Jasper Cullen

…………………

Comments

None have been posted

………………..

Beautiful Girl

For once I am with Jasper. EDWARD CHANGE BELLA SO I DON'T HAVE TO HATE HER ANYMORE!!! PLEASE JUST DO IT…FOR US!

There is no point of me screaming online when you are not even near me so you can hear me.

Bella if you are reading this I do hate you but I won't after you have been changed.

Posted by: Rosalie Cullen

……………….

Comments:

I know that you hate me Rose but can't we just be friends anyway without all this envy nonsense?

Bella Swann

………………

I'm waiting till you have been changed…but I don't think Edward will allow it to happen.

Rosalie Cullen

…………….

I don't see Edward turning you Bella.

Alice Cullen

…………….

Dammit!!!!!!

Bella Swan

Future Girl

Yay I…we have finally got MSN (an: just go to my profile and have a look at Twilight MSN. Not started story just names) after AGES of waiting. I think the humans have already got MSN because I keep seeing Bella go on a chatroom.

Why don't we talk about ourselves anymore?

I also have myspace. Yay! And I'll have 3000 friends by the end of the week. Because I am so popular. LOL the Veronicas sung that song: Popular. I hate it. It's so annoying. I'd just love to bite their little necks off.

Posted By: Alice Cullen

……………..

Comments:

THE HUMANS! That's it! I don't apreicate been addressed as "THE HUMAN" by a Vampire!

Bella Swan

…………….

Sorry Bella. I just had a name loss there.

Alice Cullen

…………….

What's a name loss?

Bella Swan

…………….

I forgot your name for a minute but when I posted it your name came back to me again.

Alice Cullen

……………

Sorry

Bella Swan

Authors Note: Natasha Ronning. Add me on Myspace.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

xXBella SwanXx

Eddie Anty Masie Cullen. How much do you want to see me in the arms or another guys arms? Because I have a HUGE crush on Brett Lee. He is SO HOT! Please Eddie oh please will you let me go out with him. He only bowls at 150km/h. Pweeze Eddie pooh. I'll lick your shoes for you. And your car…and your body and downstairs…OF THE HOUSE!

I WANT TO KISS HIM I WANT TO HUG HIM I WANT TO KISS HIM.

Uhh…I did not just say that.

Shane Watson is pretty darn cute too you know. And Ronan Keating and Channing Tatum and…uh who else is hot? Oh yes the dude who plays Harry Potter…what's his name again? A little help here please.

(Alice shouts the name from the other room)

Daniel Radcliffe that's it. No wait what am I saying? Daniel Radcliffe is so not hot. I don't know what you all think but he is so not hot. Orlando Bloom, Viggo Mortensen, and…umm…I couldn't be bothered to say who else is hot because I would be sitting here forever just trying to figure all the hot guys out.

I should go because I came here for Edward and not to spend all my time on the computer typing a new blog up.

Posted By: Bella Swann

………….

Comments:

Yes you should get your backside down here and talk to me…then I can do your hair and your nails and then we can go shopping and then see what the boys are up too.

Alice Cullen

Future Girl

I am sitting here while I am doing Bella's hair with one hand and typing with the other. I want to make her look really beautiful before she goes to see Edward. But he's not here he's gone to the skate park with Emmett and Jasper. I have no idea what Rose is up to. She probably went with them. But I thought that skating was never really her thing.

No wait she's here. She just came through the door.

Oh hang on one sec…

Okay I'm back. Bella just had a knot in her hair and it took me ages to get it out. Now she's crying because the brush got stuck in her hair and it wouldn't come out. I know how that feels because I had the same thing done to me when I was just a newborn.

Bella please get over your obsession with Brett Lee and Shane Watson. And why does he bowl at 150km/h?

Because he's a cricketer you idiot.

Sorry that was Bella. Well now I know. But what's a cricketer? Okay now's she's telling me to Google it. WHAT IS GOOGLE. I have never even used Google in my life.

Oh…so that's what it is…well…I'm going to kill them all.

NO YOU CAN'T ALICE OR I'LL NEVER SPEEK TO YOU AGAIN!

Posted By: Alice Cullen

…………

DON'T DO IT!

Bella Swann

The story of Edward Cullen

Bella…I am…you…

No you can not…I will never see you in another guys arms till as long as I live. You are going to stick with me until you die.

I will let Alice kill that pathetic little person you like to call Brett Lee who bowls at 150km/h And the Shane dude. I don't care about the others because they are not hot enough for Alice to kill.

End of discussion

Posted By: Edward Cullen

…………

Comments:

Fine. End of relationship

Bella Swann

…………

OOOOOH!

Emmett Cullen

………..

Bella love. I just don't want to see you get hurt

Edward Cullen

………..

Aww. You are so full of…

Bella Swann

……….

Guys shut up!

Alice Cullen

xXBella SwanXx

I told Edward that it would be over between us if Alice even put a finger on Brett Lee or Shane Watson.

The only reason why I don't want them both dead is because who would look after Brett's little boy and who would look after Lee, Shane's wife…or girlfriend I think it is.

And also the entire world of the cricket fans would be very depressed because their favourite cricketers have died.

And then they would know it was one of the Cullen's from the DNA and you would go to jail for 50 years and then they will notice that you're not getting older and the truth will be revealed. And then you will be killed for sure.

Do you really want that to happen?

Posted By: Bella Swan

………….

Comments

No.

Alice Cullen

………..

No.

Edward Cullen

…………

Thank you. And I'm going to change my blog name.

Bella Swan

……….

Authors Note: Brett Lee and Shane Watson…*sigh* they are SO HOT! And they have damn good voices! And Ronan Keating too. SO HOT!!

I have decided I am not going to follow the story line and go my own way. What do you think of that? Post it in your review of what you think.

PLEASE review or I'll send Alice to bite your throats! And then rip your heads off. You don't want that do you? No. Thought not. THEN REVIEW!

Thanks


	22. Chapter 22

Authors Note: When I started getting PM's from some of you guys I got worried. And I'm here right now to apologize.

I posted a chapter from Twilight MSN on this story by mistake. Sorry guys. You can read it there now because I put it on there then.

So I suppose you want another chapter since I deleted my wrong chapter for the wrong story. Okay, okay I got it…

Chapter 22

Xx Bella Swan Xx

ALICE CULLEN! I AM NEVER SPEAKING TO YOU AGAIN AS OF THIS DAY!

Does everyone want to know what she did????

-sob- she…-sob- killed –sob- I CAN'T GO ON I'M CRYING SO HARD!!!

I can't live without them! There is no –sob- point of me –sob- being here –sob- I'm just going to kill –sob- myself

Posted By: Bella Swan

………..

Comments:

HOORAY!!!

Lauren

……….

LAUREN! Bella don't kill yourself. We all love you even if we don't show it.

Jessica Stanley

………..

Mike loves you too Jess

Mike Newton

………..

Goodbye my lovers. ALICE I HATE YOU!

Bella Swan

Jazz_Is_Sweet

Arrrgghhh! Can someone help me with Bella's emotions? I can't seem to calm her down! Bella STOP CRYING THIS MINUTE OR I'LL GET ALICE TO KILL YOU!

That shut her up…oh dang she's crying again.

Edward go comfort her. Emmett go give her some comfort food. Rosalie…be nice and go see what else she wants. Alice…STAY HERE!

Posted By: Jasper Cullen

…………

Comments:

Comfort food?

Emmett Cullen

……….

CHOCOLATE YOU IDIOT!

Jasper Cullen

………

I DON'T NEED CHOCOLATE! They are dead! I need a knife. Rose bring me a knife and some fuel and some matches!

Bella Swan

……….

Beautiful Girl

Bella wants some chocolate. But she said no so I am going to get here some fuel, matches and a knife at her request.

Wonder what she is going to do.

Oh I know. She's going to kill herself so she can be with her 3 true lovers.

Bella, Daniel Radcliffe is so not hot. Eugh! I'm hotter than him! Am I right or am I right?

I'm right of course.

Because I am –drum role- ROSALIE CULLEN!

Posted By: Rosalie Cullen

Future Girl

Bella don't kill yourself please. You're going to break Edward's heart if you do. And who will be my shopping buddy. I don't really want to go with Rose because she shops for 24 hours when she is with someone else.

I'm sorry for killing them. What do you say? Can we still be friends and you can still live?

What do you say Bella?

Posted By: Alice Cullen

…………

Comments:

Get stuffed

Bella Swan

………..

Bella be reasonable

Alice Cullen

…………

Who is going to be my "buddy" whom I "play" with at night when no one is around?

Emmett Cullen

………..

WHAT !

Rosalie Cullen

……….

Hi i'm…

Emmett Cullen

……….

Oh

Rosalie Cullen

Authors Note: Who do you think Alice killed?

What do you think is going to happen to Bella?

And what does Emmett mean by his "buddy that he plays with when no one is around?"


	23. Chapter 23

Authors Note: Yay we made it to 107 all in one night. Thanks to everyone who reviewed.

JJ-OO-JJ you are right about the people who Bella was talking about and so was Jaq's-Out-Punching-Werewolfs. No I did not kill Orlando Bloom. But he's coming back in the story soon. Probably this chapter or the next. Keep reading for that.

Virtual high five back to Fanpire96 (yeah go us Aussie)

And Nessie is 6 years old here. WAY to young to get married to Jacob.

And yes…I killed the cricket players…I mean ALICE killed them…but wait…there's a twist…Mua, ha, ha, ha

Chapter 23

Xx Bella Swan Xx

I am going to kill myself because Alice killed them and I'm not talking to her or anyone else

I am going to kill myself because Alice killed them and I'm not talking to her or anyone else

I am going to kill myself because Alice killed them and I'm not talking to her or anyone else

I am going to kill myself because Alice killed them and I'm not talking to her or anyone else

I am going to kill myself because Alice killed them and I'm not talking to her or anyone else

I am going to kill myself because Alice killed them and I'm not talking to her or anyone else

I am going to kill myself because Alice killed them and I'm not talking to her or anyone else

I am going to kill myself because Alice killed them and I'm not talking to her or anyone else

I would like my fuel, knife and that other thing from Rosalie if that is not too much to ask for.

Emmett I don't want your chocolate.

Edward I want to break up.

Dad…goodbye

Posted By: Bella Swan

…………

Comments:

Who did Alice kill Bella?

Charlie Swan

………..

BRETT LEE AND SHANE WATSON! AND RONAN KEATING!!!

Bella Swan

………..

Who?

Charlie Swan

……….

The Australian cricket players!!!!!

Now excuse me BUT WHERE IS MY KNIFE, MATCHES AND FUEL?????

Bella Swan

………..

It's here

Rosalie Cullen

Sexy Doc

Oh god help us all. Bella is trying to kill herself like a vampire would…HEY WATCH OUT BELLA! Sorry about that but she almost put the match on my head…

Arrghh my HAIR!!!

Phew…it's out

She almost tried to kill me there.

I had a phone call by some loser called something Bloom…Ovilanda Bloom…Oscar Bloom? Uh…Olivia Bloom?

Posted By: Carlisle Cullen

…………

Comments:

Orlando Bloom

Jasper Cullen

…………

YES! He wants to talk to Alice for some reason.

Carlisle Cullen

Jazz_Is_Sweet

_ORLANDO BLOOM _wants to talk to Alice. I hope that he is not trying to take her away from me or I will bite his little neck off.

I can't seem to control Bella's emotions. Who gave her the fuel and the matches and the knife? Emmett I'll bet. Just for a laugh.

No wait Alice is telling me that Bella told Rosalie to get them for her.

I better go…help this little…tripper. LOL

Posted By: Jasper Cullen

………….

Comments:

None have been posted

"Bella you can't do this to yourself" said Edward trying to take the dangerous tools off her but missed because she held them out of his reach. "Just get over the fact that they are dead and there is nothing that you can do about it"

"Excuse me…but I'm not talking to you and you're pathetic little coven. I HATE you Edward Anthony Mason Cullen!" Bella screamed raising the knife over her head and bringing it down over the table

They all jumped and everyone gasped at what Bella had just said

"I don't love you anymore. Alice I wish you were dead! I hate you, you squawky little pixie with no consideration for anyone else's feelings!" yelled Bella

Alice gasped

"Bella Marie Swan…wait till I tell you're father what you've just said. He'll ground you for life" said Esme quietly

"At least I have a life" said Bella before turning and walking out the front door to her truck.

Authors Note: Yay! Do you like the last bit of the story? I'm going to start putting stories in FHSB because I'm getting sick of writing blogs. Yes there still will be blogs but not as many

Please review guys. And I'll have a new summary up soon too.

Any suggestions for a new summary? Appreciated much


	24. Chapter 24

Xx Bella Swan Xx

As I sit here in my bedroom and think _what have I done _over and over again in my head. I have probably broke Edward's heart today. And lost a good friend too.

Oh well. I probably still have Jess, Mike, Angela and the rest of them…I hope. And there are plenty of people in Forks that would be my friend.

I have finally put this blog on private because I don't really want anyone reading my personal day to day thoughts.

As I found out before I told the Cullen's to get stuffed. Alice had not killed Shane, Brett and Ronan. She just took them away from Australia and put them in a garbage can for some reason. But the next part is worse…she changed them…into Vampires. I just have to find out where they are and get them to bite me so I can join their coven.

I don't give a crap what Edward and the rest have to say about this. I need to block my mind from Alice.

Posted By: Bella Swan

…………

Comments:

None have been posted

Loving Mother/wife for eternity

I can't believe Bella would say that to us. I mean she has been so kind ever since Edward decided to be her girlfriend. I thought he had found the girl whom he would spend the rest of his life with and now she turns away from him because of something Alice did and Edward won't let her kill herself.

This is confusing when you don't know half of what's going on. Someone fill me in please.

I heard Emmett talking about Aussie cricketers or something like that today. They must have lost a match against New Zealand. YES!!! (AN/ Bad, bad, bad)

Then he started talking about Ronan Keating…what's going on?

Posted By: Esme Cullen

…………

Comments:

Sorry but we're going to have to leave you in the dark for a while Esme

Alice Cullen

Authors Note: Short yes I know. But it's the best I can do at 8:56pm. Night all. And please review


	25. Chapter 25

Authors Note: Please guys I do have a life and I can't be updating every day you know.

Fampire96: I went to America for a week to see Twilight and just have a holiday because I finished year 12. I went and saw it again with my friends when it came out in Australia.

I'm glad you think Brett Lee is hot also. He has broken up with Liz now y'know…I'm trying to get my mum to hook up with him…IMPOSSIBLE!

And people you will eventually get a happy chapter. Don't make the author mad because she will simply just delete this story and she won't be back on fanfiction EVER! This is another sad one. If you don't like it…you can go jump

Chapter 24

"Where is Carlisle?" Esme asked Emmett who was lying on the lounge watching soccer. Honestly how can he watch something so boring. The little idiot didn't even bothering answer me so I asked Alice who was walking past

"Alice have you seen Carlisle?"

"Um…he's at work. Didn't he tell you?" she asked me

"No…did he say when he was coming back?" I asked

"Later tonight. No wait…I'm having a vision. He says he'll be back at 5:30. That's another half hour away. Why are you looking for him?" Alice asked

"Oh it doesn't matter. And don't look into my future…" I say to her. I know she will anyway

"Have you seen Edward?" Alice asks me

"In his room sulking" I say

Alice then ran at full speed out of the house and to who knows where. Which reminded me. I needed to do the laundry. Then I thought why did she run away when Edward was in his room? Stupid Vampire.

Sexy Doc

I should be dead. I now wish I didn't put the fire out in my hair. I have put this blog on private which nearly everyone in this family has done so already. I'm going to get Alice to see what everyone's password is so I can see what they are saying about me. Probably nothing but it couldn't hurt to look.

I have done something really, really bad. I THINK Esme will get a divorce if she ever found out. But I'm just going to keep it quite between me and Alice. I just told her not to tell Esme or anyone else. Even Edward.

Posted by: Carlisle Cullen

…………

Comments:

None have been posted

"Hello is Carlisle around?" I heard Alice say from the receptionist desk

"Yeah I'll just get him for you" said Clancy the receptionist getting up out of her chair and walking into my office

"Carlisle it's your daughter. She wants to see you." Said Clancy

"Tell her I'll be right there." I said to her. She nodded and walked back out of the room

But then Alice came in the room.

"Sorry to disturb you but we really need to talk" said Alice taking the seat opposite mine

"What's up?" I said to her

"Are you going to tell Esme or not. Because I don't want her to have a broken heart and neither do the rest of us if she ever found out" she said

"I will okay. When the time is right." I said

"Okay. I should go because my eyes are turning Topaz and I hate having to explain why they do that to Clancy every single time I'm hungry" said Alice

"Yep. Okay. See you later tonight" I said to her

Authors Note: NOT updating till next week. That's right…MONDAY NEXT WEEK!

Leave a review.

PM if you need me for some reason


	26. Chapter 26

Authors Note: Not going to be a long one. Sorry but Mr Plot Bunny has died and left me with nothing again. Got to go hunt down another one and bring it back to my computer. Yes I have been in Perth (Western Australia) watching the cricket. South Africa won. Grr! Hope Australia wins the next.

Chapter 26

"Why did you do it anyway?" Alice asked me one night when everyone was too far away for them to hear.

"I just wanted to know what one tasted like. I never ate one when I was human and I never ate one as I am not and I wanted to know what it tasted like. And awful I'll have to admit. Stinking little hoppy thing" I said

"It's called a grasshopper" said Alice

"Stinking little hoppy grasshopper" I said

"That's better. But why did you eat it? I doesn't even have much blood" Alice said

"When Esme and I got together she forbade me to ever eat a grasshopper. She told me that you would be very sick and you would possibly die if you were really hungry for they had not much blood" I said "And since then I haven't eaten one. Except for now"

"Oh. Tell Esme because here she comes and she isn't looking happy. Oh wait. Emmett just killed Bambi" Alice said looking out the window

Esme was pulling Emmett's ear right back to the house. Somehow Emmett didn't want to have Bambi for lunch. He just liked killing them.

"I told you to kill it!" screamed Esme

"S-sorry. I like Mr Bambi" said Emmett

"I'm not going to tell her Alice" I said to her

"TELL ME WHAT EXACTLY?" screamed Esme

I took a deep breath then said:

"I ate a grasshopper right after I ate 4 sheep and 2 lions. I'm sorry" I said

"That's not that bad. Who cares about what you ate. Emmett you are grounded for a month. I'm taking your Jeep." Said Esme

Emmett stormed up to his and Rose's room and pretended to cry

Alice laughed

Authors Note: I should derseve something like: CRAP. I can do better than that!

Yes I can do better than that but I just came home. Give me some credit. You've all been waiting paciently for a week and now here it is.

Oh yes and another thing is I'm making another story. 2 storys. Emmett's Pathetic Little Diary and Life changing experience.

Yeah…


	27. Chapter 27

Authors Note: Happy new year everyone. Sorry that I haven't updated in a while but I've been trying to think up some new stories. Nothing. Guys can you please read my new story _**I don't want this life**_. And then review it. It's only new so yeah.

Chapter 27

**Story of Edward Cullen**

I've lost Bella. She has completely vanished into thin air. Poof just like that. Perhaps she's gone to Hogwarts…wait a second while I go and find Charlie…

Sorry I'm back. Bella wasn't at her house either…wait a minute again…aren't Bella and I going through a fight now?

We are…

I'm not looking for Bella!

Posted By: Edward Cullen

…………

Comments:

Bloody Hell Edward.

Emmett Cullen

…………

Language Emmett. And I thought you weren't allowed to go on the computer for another week. I'm telling Esme.

Alice Cullen

…………

I'LL GIVE YOU PIXIE STICKS FOR A WEEK IF YOU DON'T TELL!!!

Emmett Cullen

……….

Mmmm…that's quite an offer. Can I discuss it with my husband?

Alice Cullen

………..

Emmett Cullen

Sure why not

………

Then I'll do it!

Alice Cullen

………..

But I don't have Pixie Sticks to last a week. In fact I don't have any.

Emmett Cullen

………

Meet me at my house Emmett

B.S

**Thoughs of a Practical Joker**

May I ask who this mysterious B.S. girl or boy is. He/she has been sending me messages all day. And the worst part is I don't know who it is.

-Gasp- It could be an IMPOSTER!

Or worse –

An evil bear…I'LL KILL IT!!!!!!!

No bears can't really talk can they? Only in those stupid animated movies where the bear befriends the human and they end up getting married to each other and have kids that are humears. Well that's what the humans say they were called. Why wouldn't they same something crossed between a bear and a human something more sensible. I mean that's just stupid…

Anyway back to this mystery.

If it's not a bear and it's not a vampire…that mean…-gasp- HUMAN!

B.S. Who do I know that has the initials B.S. Barney Sawyer, Brigitte Stone, Bella Swan, Blake Sweden.

Hummm…

Posted By: Emmett Cullen

…………

Comments:

OMFG! It's Bella!

Emmett Cullen

Author Note: I've lost track of where I am. Sorry that this chapter is boring. I really need ideas. Can all of you please leave in your reviews some ideas of what I can put in my next chapter because I can't think of anything. Thanks 


	28. Chapter 28

Authors Note: Sorry again for the block. I've just had my plot bunny run away to Disneyland and someone went "Accio" and brought it back for me. Thanks.

xXBella SwanXx

Oh no. I think I may have made the biggest mistake of my life inviting Emmett here today. But I think it was all for a good cause. Edward and I got back together after he made me apologize to Esme and the rest of the family. Emmett was crying about how lovely it all way until Jasper controlled him.

But the only down thing was that Alice kept glaring at me…I think she may have been reading my future.

As always after Edward and I had a fight we went out to dinner…uh correction _I _went out to dinner. He just watched me eat.

After Edward dropped me home I found Charlie lying on the lounge giggiling away to what looked like the Simpsons. I walked up to him and said:

"Charlie why are you giggiling?"

He didn't answer he just laughed even more.

As I made my way up to my room Edward was waiting for me as always. We ended up talking till 3 in the morning. And by that time Charlie was still watching the damn Simpsons. I think he ordered in some DVD's.

Perhaps he has SOD (Simpson Obsessive Disorder)

Posted By: Bella Swan

………..

Comments

EAT MY SHORTS!

Emmett Cullen

……….

Very mature Emmett

Rosalie Cullen

The Story of Edward Cullen

I must say I think Bella's dad is on crack or something the way he was laughing last night. I was thinking of going down there and biting him while Bella was asleep but then I thought: no I better not. Bella would probably break up with me again or burn me.

Horrible girl…joke Bella joke.

Posted By: Edward Cullen

………..

Comments:

None have been posted

"Hey Bella do you want to go shopping?" asked Bella to Bella

"Yes of course I do" Bella said

"No you don't. Money won't buy you happiness" said Bella

"Yes it does" said Bella

"Nuh-uh" said Bella

"Okay tell me who s not happy with their money"

"Why don't you tell me?"

"Ah ha! I knew there weren't people that didn't like their money

"So are you going shopping then?"

"Yes"

"Thought so"

Authors Note: That was Bella fighting with herself to go on a shopping trip. Please review. I would love to hear what ideas you guys have. So could you pop them into your reviews…

HEY I saw that! You were going to leave without reviewing. Move your mouse to the left and click on that purple button. R-E-V-I-E-W


	29. Chapter 29

Authors Note

Hey guys I'm sorry that I haven't updated my stories in a long time. I have been very busy with all my school work and other things.

But I will get a new chapter up soon. But I need some ideas first.

Today is the only chance I've been able to get on the computer as my computer has finally gone extinct. I should be getting a new one this week.

But next week is camp so I can't update then. I don't know when I'll update next. I'll try to make it before the end of the year.

I'm sorry for making everyone wait so long. Please don't set Edward Cullen on me. But you can set Prince Caspian on me if you'd like to. I wouldn't mind *sigh, shiver, shiver sigh*

HE IS SO DAMN HOT! Hands up if you agree. Yeah, yeah. OH YEAH!

Sorry…I have PCD

I might be deleting the Hogwarts MSN story because that's not getting anywhere at this stage. And the Emmett story.

If you'd still like to see them go on please say so. I need at least 10 people to say they want it to go on.

Well anyway I better go

I love you all heaps and I'm still alive

Love you

Xxoo

CAHP (Crazy about Harry Potter)

P.S. I'll change my penname soon. Not now though.

P.P.S: I have myspace. Just add me on: Natasha Ronning. (That would be my name)

Cheers xx


	30. Chapter 30

Authors Note: I'm sorry if I have left you all hanging for ages and ages and ages. It's just I have been so busy with schoool stuff it isn't funny. I was on camp last week. Assignments the week before and week before that. I'm sorry guys. I have not forgotten about you.  
Here is the next chapter for you all.  
Oh and BTW I have gotten my profile an update. Have a look at that. There's not much new to see.

Chapter 30

XxBella SwanXx Wow I can't believe it's May already. Gosh the time does fly when one is having fun. Oh dear...I didn't get anything for my mum for mothers day today. But fortunatly Alice sent her something that I have no idea about. Probably clothes knowing her. I got the new Ronan Keating cd for Esme because I know how much she loves him. I should have gotten it for myself but thought better of it because she's reck it in a day by playing the songs over and over again.  
When Esme got the cd and the flowers she went on about how she didn't really want anything for mothers day and all the things mothers tend to do. We gave them to her anyway.

Posted By:  
Bella Swan _  
Comments:

Bells she did love it just so you know Edward Cullen _  
But she loved mine more Emmett Cullen _  
Boys I loved everyones pressent equally Esme Cullen _  
Yay!  
Emmett Cullen _  
Bella Swan WTF???

Beautiful Girl Oh my gosh. My nails just broke off. And my hair is so messed. Oh my goodness! Gosh I am just haveing a bad day today. Ugh!  
Eww I have a pimple! WHAT THE HELL AM I GOING TO DO

Pick at it Rose

F**k off Emmett.  
Posted by: Rosalie Cullen -  
Comments -  
Language miss Esme Cullen -  
MRS!  
Rosalie Cullen

!Mr Trigger!  
Wow I never realised how much Edward and Bella love each other. It's so sweet how they look at each other. It's like that are meant to be. I hope they get married one day. They would make a great couple. And such a big family the Cullen's.  
Mike Newton you need to hand in your Trigonemetry homework that you have NOT done for 3 weeks. And it will be 3 weeks detention if you don't hand it in by the end of the week. Understood? Because we are moving onto a movie review soon.  
And there is something else that I wanted to point out too but I have forgotten.  
Oh yes...no mobile phones in class please. They distract you and then you don't get all the important information that you need and may come in handy when you leave school.  
Posted by: !Trigger!

Comments Mr...Trigger? Why the hell are you being called Mr Trigger?  
Mike Newton -  
Inside joke Mr Newton mind your own business Mr !Trigger!

Authors Note: Someone please tell me the name of the Biology teacher that gives the Golden Onion to Bella in Twilight. I know he isn't the Trigernometry teacher but I need to know.  
Also...reviews are welcome here.  
I'm deleting a few stories so if you ever want to see them again you'll have to say so. So that means a nice little trip to my profile.  
See I still love you all. I am finally not busy. HOORAY! 


	31. Chapter 31

AN: I have got no idea of what happened in the last chapter at Forks because I am lazy and could not be bothered to look back.

I'm sorry that I haven't updated for a few months. Hope you all have the decency to review.

In this chapter we skip 3 months...it was May I think...

Chapter 31 - August

Xx Bella Swan Xx

Wow how the months fly by...

Edward bought me a goat...but I think he only bought it to please himself and see Emmett chase it all around the yard. He keeps at his place because my place does not have a fence...well neither does his place but the goat has more room to run around there.

I named it Mr Fluffy...

Even though it's a she...

Mr Fluffy is pregnant too...we don't know what type of sex it is yet...it is going to be a surprise for when the baby comes.

I wish Edward had bought me a sheep instead...

Posted By: Bella Swan

..................................

Comments:

None have been posted

Beautiful Girl

...fluffy.

The freaking Goat decided to come into the house (Emmet's doing) and destroyed the whole house...oh boy...if I get my hands on that goat I will kill it...

Oh wait...if I do that Bella will kill me.

HA! I'd like to see her try!

Emmett also bought a IPod for himself...he's been walking around the house singing to all the songs that he has uploaded from some site called ITunes...it's funny...there is no music on his IPod because he hasn't put any on it yet...the idiot didn't save it. I guess everyone is having troubles with their partners...

Posted By: Rosalie Cullen

....................

Comments:

None have been posted

Mother of the Vampires

I have changed my name and have blocked all the humans...except for Bella because she knows what I am...and the rest of the family.

Yeah...Just wanted to say that...

Oh and I've noticed that everyone is having partner troubles...

...everyone except for me and Carlisle...

Posted by: Esme Cullen

Comments:

Thank god for that

11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111

AN: Reviews please!!

And I need ideas...!!!!


	32. Chapter 32

Xx Bella Swann Xx

Mr Fluffy has had her baby...it's a girl...Emmett wanted to eat it...told him to go hunting and find something else to eat to cure his hunger. He declined...so I hit him over the head with a frying pan and knocked him out...Rosalie isn't happy with me right now...am hiding with the wolves and Jacob...at least she won't come here. If she does I will happily make the wolves eat her...then the rest of them will be happy and there will be no more blonde jokes...

Jasper came to my house last night and was standing where Edward stood before we got together...turns out Jasper was very lonely and asked if he could spend the night with me...I said he could and asked where Alice was...he said that Alice was out hunting for the next 2 days...then about half an hour later Emmett came and asked if he could spend the night with me too...I asked why...and he said that Rosalie kicked him out of the house so she could go hunting...I said why did she kick you out of the house if she was going hunting...i never got the answer out of him because Edward came jumping into the room telling them to leave...after they left he told me if he could spend the night because...I don't think I will ever find out what he said because that's when i woke up...that was the most worst dream I have ever had in my whole life

Thankfully Edward took me out to breakfast and we had a very good chat

Posted by: Bella Swan

Comments:

None have been posted

Blondie

Yes...I have changed my name to Blondie because Jacob the dog asked me too...so I did it just to make him happy.

Anyway...I've been thinking...I would like a change of scenery for a change...I want to go to Antarctica for a month and hunt Polar Bears and penguins...the 2 animals that I have never eaten before or even tasted...I have heard though that penguins don't taste very nice...there blood is awful said one of my friends who is also a vampire.

Then when I get back me and Emmett are going to make love...that's what Alice says...and so I am going to make that thought come true

Posted By: Rosalie Cullen

Comments:

I'd love to

Emmett


	33. Chapter 33

Hey guys. I know it's been ages since I last updated this story. You've probably all forgotten about it by now and deleted it off your story alert and favourites list.  
Well...I'm back and I'm ready to give you a new chapter. It's been a while and Twilight isn't exactly my favourite thing anymore (I grew out of it. And no I don't like Justin Bieber...ew...I'm sorry to those of you that do like him. I don't. Please don't hate me)

-

Chapter 33  
Blondie  
Hey everyone. In case you've been wondering where on earth I am and what I could be possibly be doing that is more fun than your having.  
I'm in Antarctica...and it's freezing! I've eaten a few dozen polar bears and penguins. Once you get over the fluff and feathers the blood actually tastes really nice. Just thought you'd like to know.  
OMG...I just totally forgot, humans are following me on my blog. Oh no. I'm doomed. Now they're going to send stakes over and try and kill me. Well guess what? You can't kill me with stakes you pathetic little humans. You can only kill vampires with FIRE!  
Oh no...I just gave another secret away. THIS IS EMMETTS DOING; I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!  
Posted by: Rosalie Hale / Cullen

Comments -2  
WTF? I didn't have anything to do with this. You always seem to blame everything on me. It's not fair! *runs away*  
Emmett Cullen

*Brightens the mood*  
Jasper Hale / Cullen

The story of Edward Cullen  
*Sigh*  
Why do my family act so weird?  
I wish I was with anyone but them. I'd even live with the humans if I could. Strange thing about that, is I already do; Bella Swan.  
I go to school with hundreds of the food loving creatures.  
That's another thing. I could ditch school if I wanted to. But I'm not allowed to, which really kills...I mean sucks...uh...it's not fair...heheh *nervous laughter*  
Carlisle (**AN/ There...I finally spelt it right) **said that if I wanted to leave school, I would have to finish of the year, then go to college and study medicine. But I'd rather be in a place full of humans than in a place full of sick ones that are dying. I don't think I could handle the pressure and smell of it all. I'd end up killing someone in the end.  
But it's better if Jasper is around so that he could control my mood if anything bad did happen.  
Posted by: Edward Cullen

Comments -5  
Aww thanks Eddie poo  
Emmett Cullen

Dude...I wasn't talking about you  
Edward Cullen

Silly Emmett...wanna come feed with me in Antarctica?  
Rosalie Hale / Cullen

HELL YEAH!  
Emmett Cullen

Please keep it G rated guys.  
Esme Cullen


	34. Chapter 34

**Authors Note:** HEEEEYY GUYS! It's certainly been a while since I last update, but I can assure you that I'm back, and I'm ready to wow you with my crappy story skills, haha!  
Now that I've finished school forever, I have time to keep you up to date, that it until I get myself a job.  
I hope you like what I have for you. Remember – READ and REVIEW!

**Blondie**

Emmett had an unfortunate incident with a Penguin earlier in the day. I'm not sure who was more frightened, Emmett of the Penguin. I mean, who just jumps out at someone like a lizard waiting to attack a fly? That's just a bit extream.

**Comments:  
**I thought you weren't going to say anything! Dammit Rose, why do you always have to embarrass me like this! Waaaaahhh!  
**Emmett Cullen**

Rose, why are you married to this guy again?  
**Alice Cullen**

Good question Alice, good question.  
**Rosalie Cullen / Hale**

BECAUSE I HAVE A BIG ANACONDA! Heheh *wink, wink, nudge, nudge*  
**Emmett Cullen**

...  
**Rosalice Cullen / Hale**

**Thoughts of a Practical Joker**

GUYS! Guess what? Rosalie thinks that my anaconda is the size of the peremiter of the earth! Ohh yeah, we're going to have LOTS of fun in bed tonight, ehehe.

**Comments:**

Sweet baby Jesus, I cannot deal with this anymore  
**Rosalie Cullen / Hale**


End file.
